Storms Named Cindy

Hurricane Cindy 1999

Yesterday a friend sent me a link to a story on 'Tropical Storm Cindy' which is currently in the Gulf of Mexico. Although not expected to intensify, there is still the chance of a devastating impact due to coastal flooding. I was also reminded of the impact storms named Cindy had in my life in 1999 and 2011. I dug through Facebook notes and found the one I wrote July 20, 2011:

******************************* Tropical Storm Cindy has formed in the Atlantic.

Just saw that posted and my first thought was, "I can't see or hear any news until this is gone!" I am still attempting to recover from the devastation of Hurricane Cindy 1999!! You are probably thinking to yourself, "I don't remember Hurricane Cindy." It started as a depression. I could completely relate to that! I was quite depressed myself!! Furthermore, it was off-center & difficult to locate. Oh yeah! I was trying to hide within myself since I couldn't literally escape.

The news went on about how it was becoming more intense, and becoming a tropical storm. There were stories of it organizing! Well, I was trying to organize a project I had let lapse for several years, so I used this as a spur to action. I would get organized!! I could get my life back together!! She began to fall apart, but then there was an announcement that she had reorganized and was getting stronger! Yes!! I, too, could regroup, reorganize, and grow stronger!! Go Cindy!!

Then, alas, the news came that once again Cindy had weakened and succumbed to being a depression. As I listened to the news daily and sobbed as I heard televised reports of "Cindy is indecisive and keeps going back and forth in strength.", "We thought Cindy was going to be important, but she turned into much ado about nothing", and "Cindy turned out to be completely insignificant." Of course I did not want any person, place, or thing to be harmed by a hurricane, but I was to the point that I had totally turned this into something all about me. Even now, when I look it up, it is remembered as: 
Cindy had a long track with no direct impact.
Now, comes the question of whether that is still my life. Oh, depression still comes and goes with no warning. Sometimes I think I should just change my name to Capricious. 😄

However, I did make some changes. The most important was to renew my commitment to Jesus Christ. I had not lost my faith, but I had virtually been stuck in the house for nearly 5 years following a car wreck. Walking was extremely painful & difficult, and I felt trapped. But I found a church that I could walk to, even if it was only by pushing a grandchild in a stroller. Still for several months, I did not get involved in any activities or interact with others. The fact that they needed a teacher for the 1 year old class, and my 1 year old grandson would only stay with me or his parents, spurred me to action.

Now my biggest problem is when I find myself being so busy doing work for  the Lord that I don't always spend time with the Lord. Fortunately, He does remind me when I am neglecting Him. He knows how easily I slip into bad habits...and how miserable I am when I don't spend time with Him. More than anything, I want to be His hands & feet, and serve others in His Name! So, even when I am feeling overwhelmed, there is peace in the "storm".

The LORD is my strength and shield. I trust Him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy. I burst out in songs of thanksgiving. ~ Psalm 28:7

"Thunder and lightning, storms and tempests, eclipses and meteors, tornadoes and earthquakes, are proofs to all that there is a Supreme Being, who is wonderful and terrible in His acts."~ R. A. Torrey

I admit, that although I always pray there are no devastating effects, I do love stormy weather. I love that quote by R A Torrey! It always makes me think of "The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands." ~ Psalm 19:1 And, when I reach the end of my life I hope that it can be said of me:
Cindy had a long track with a direct impact on others through her service to her Savior.
**************************************************
Now there is a new storm and time for a new self-evaluation. There have been both good and bad changes since July 20, 2011. I am not willing to discuss them publicly right now, but thoughts are not as organized as I would like today. I will probably re-edit this at another time. Just saying that I have stepped way out of my comfort zone several times---and LOVED it!! But, I have also built a stronger, higher tower around myself for emotional protection. And unlike the history of storms named Cindy, I want to be more steady and predictable---and to be a source of good, not destruction. Of course, the first step might be to quit taking it so personal whenever I see a mention of Hurricane/Tropical Storm/Depression "Cindy" since I do know they are speaking of weather.

And, I need to quit listening to the voices of others who try to define the real me...except for those who are giving me wise counsel and drawing me nearer to Jesus.

Take The Year By Storm!

When He thunders, the waters in the heavens are in turmoil, and He causes the clouds to rise from the ends of the earth. He makes lightning for the rain and brings the wind from His storehouses. ~Jeremiah 10:13

As I was taking my last walk for 2010, it turned into a walk in the rain... with the sound of thunder in the distance. Since I happen to love thunderstorms, it made me smile with anticipation of what may lay ahead. Literally ahead of me, I could observe the spectacular and colorful array of fireworks!! Due to the approaching storms, celebrations by the lake were moved forward and I was blessed to catch the display.The slight melancholia that had been with me as I began this walk (after all, it is the final hours of 2010, and I was reflecting) quickly vanished as though snatched away by the wind that increased in strength.

A friend had written about taking the new year by storm and his words immediately came to the forefront of my mind. Since we share an affinity for this type weather, I knew exactly what he meant when he had used that description.That metaphor gave me the perfect imagery of rejoicing in the power and magnificence and awe of what our God can do!! He had also referred to a verse that had just never grabbed my attention before:

From the days of John the Baptist until now the kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and violent men take it by force. ~ Matthew 11:12

As I googled (my favorite new verb!) my way through various translations and commentaries to reach a better understanding of context and application, I was completely caught up and unaware of anything around me. Y'all aren't going to believe me, but I promise this is true: My 'AHA!' moment was punctuated with a brilliant streak of lightning and a tremendous crash of thunder!! I love God's sense of humor!! :)

Violence does have a negative image, just as the thought of a violent storm puts many in fear. I have a respect for the power of a storm, but I have to admit that my first reaction is sheer exuberance. A passion or zeal for God is the connotation I receive from both this verse and thunderstorms. Just as I don't cower in fear during a storm, neither do I want to cower in fear from life ...or God.

As a little girl, we had many summer thunderstorms. As the wind would begin blowing, I would stretch out my arms and race headlong into it as fast as I could run, laughing in absolute delight! The joy I felt while running, spinning around, and dancing along with the leaves in the trees is the same way I want to feel about life now: knowing that a storm is approaching but enjoying the moments before and watching in amazement as God displays His power in the storm.

So, yes, my friend, I agree with you that 2011 will be a year we will take by storm! God will be with you, me, and all the rest every step of the way demonstrating just how mighty and awesome He really is!!!

May 2011 be a year of joy and peace in each of your lives. God bless you all!!!